Things I’ve Noticed About Japan

Just a couple of things I’ve noticed during my time in Japan so far.

Japanese Commercials Are More Entertaining Than Japanese Primetime Shows
I’ll sum up my reasons in two sentences. There is a Japanese commercial about a guy decked out in gold chains and jewelry that spends all his time blocking bullets with his gold watch and jumping from high places looking super intense. All Japanese shows are about pulling from a pool of about 30 people and making them either eat, play games, or talk about eating and playing games.

No One Knows Who Rurutia Is
Rurutia is my all time favorite singer. Unfortunately, even though she’s a Japanese singer, no one here has any idea who she is. Apparently she’s pretty much an indies singer so it’s not really unexpected, but I’m still sore.

Makeup Is Rationed In Japan
I think that once you form a couple in Japan, the government places a limit on the amount of makeup you may purchase in a month. However, the limit is really only enough for one person. This results in a discrepancy between the physical attractiveness in most of the couples in Japan. Basically, in a couple if the guy is good looking, the girl isn’t, and vice versa. However, it seems that there is no limit placed on single people, unfortunately this results in the unpleasant situation where old maids put on a metric ton of makeup and start looking like demon clowns.

Weather Does Not Affect Clothing Choices
I really don’t understand how Japanese people judge temperature. In summer, Japan is hot and humid. This makes it so you sweat all the time no matter what you do. To help reinforce this idea, everyone will always mention how atsui (hot) it is while fanning themselves or wiping off their sweat. However, while they’re saying this they’re wearing jeans, and a long sleeve shirt. I wonder if they dress that way just so they can have something to talk about.

Japanese People Will Always Agree With You No Matter What
No matter what you say when talking to a Japanese person, their first reaction will be to agree with you. This should not be confused with them actually agreeing with you. Very often they will follow up their positive response moments before tearing you a new asshole and completely crushing your argument.

Kids Suck
This actually isn’t limited to Japan, I hate kids. They’re annoying, loud, and completely oblivious to their surroundings. I was standing at a crosswalk waiting for the light to turn when I see a kid just run out into the middle of the crosswalk without even bothering to look around him. While he’s running into the middle of the road like a complete idiot a truck turns left and almost rams into him. The kid’s reaction? To stop in the middle of the road and look the other way. He’s standing in the middle of a oneway road, and he looks the wrong way for oncoming traffic. At worst, he has a 50/50 chance of choosing the right direction to look in. Although I guess it’s actually more like 25% because I wouldn’t put it past the brat to look at the sidewalk for approaching cars. Anyways, the truck honks for the kid to get out of the way, and he just continues to stand there with a shit-eating grin on his face. Eventually the two working neurons in the kids head collide and he gets out of the street. He then proceeds to cross the other crosswalk and keep on walking. Turns out he didn’t even need to cross the street in the first place. I hate kids*.

*Some of you are probably thinking “you were a kid once too!” First, thanks for pointing out the obvious. Second, if I ever traveled back in time and met myself as a kid, I would beat the crap at of him for being such a whiny bitch.


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6 Responses to Things I’ve Noticed About Japan

  1. agnes says:

    how do you define kid?
    some interesting observation…..

  2. David says:

    Good observation.
    Agreeing only means they are listerning and acknolwedge your speaking.
    Kids, I thought you play well with kids.

  3. dyshin says:

    You have got to link me to that commercial. I don’t know what it’s for, but I’m sure I want to buy it.

    Also, I think I took care of that last part for you plenty.

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